We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
