do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Please, let me fuck your mom
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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