Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
