I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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