It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
