are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
