Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
