this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
