Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
