Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
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