My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
