Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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