I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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