p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
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