then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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