She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize