I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Just pee around me
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
