Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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