weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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