i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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