Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
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