dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
