and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I am naked and annoyed.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
