I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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