Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
