I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
