At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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