Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
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