doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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