she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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