I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
