You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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