Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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