There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
