How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
