he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
