just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
