it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
