your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Just invented taco cereal.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Randomize
