A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize