I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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