How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize