i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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