I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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