C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
i dont even know how to be here
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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