I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize