you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
