I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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