Pappa wants mamma naked
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
