A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
