Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
