whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
